Lost Sight, Found Strength

The path is so dark and dim, but Julie keeps walking. She is scared, yet her adrenaline makes her look back several times, urging her to walk faster with each step. She wonders why she can't move faster and then realizes it's just her thoughts getting wilder the longer she's on the road. She shouldn't have chosen this path—terrified and confused. She's already halfway through. It sucks. The only way is to adapt, over time. She has one more block, two more, and again she convinces herself it's just one more step to her destination. She's no longer afraid when she starts looking at the sky instead of the road. The evening feels scarier when it's right in front of our eyes, but when it's above, the stars are beautiful. The cold air on her skin feels warmer as her mind grows calmer. Gently, she realizes that she's no longer worried. In fact, she's arrived, in no time. -- I think loneliness comes from the mind. It's not about being surrounded ...
Do you know why it's hard to say goodbye? Because we afraid if our memories might not be able to remember them, rightly. The fact is, goodbye means good. No matter how hard.
~Aurora Esterlia

Explain to Me

 I was with him all day and all he did was reply to the conversations I brought up. 

"This whole ball exhausted me." The Old Lady bragged about her own ball party tonight in the Ritz. I'm just here as a niece trying to give the best smile because it's her party.

And he always sits across from me. I sat there wanting to have it. I only wanted to try it once. Even though he can't be mine.

"I must go back to my room tonight." I say to everyone. They let me out of the party. I found myself continuing to walk up the circular staircase leading to the Ritz lobby.

Someone held my hand from behind. My gloved hands. Even though I only see his big hand that is grabbing mine, if only I take off my gloves when He could hold my hand.

"What must I do if I can't be with you?" His whisper made me want to turn around, but I couldn't. My feet kept stepping down the stairs, carrying me away. 

Then He held my hand.

"What are you doing?" I wanted to let go of my hand but he held on to it.

"I can not tell what you're feeling or thinking…can I?"

"Stop it."

"No... I can't."

"Why?"

Because I can't say true love. That love is long gone. Lost since the One I love was broken.

I think he saw my gaze right now. Then he whispered to me.

"What would you do?" He asked. 

I don't want to hear those words from him. 

Everything is like a magnet. I can't refuse because that's what I want all day. 

I want to be with him. Even if only once.

"This is what you want," He lead me. No one sees us.

No one knows.

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