Reserve

As I sat on the sofa, I leaned against an invisible shoulder.  I walked quickly right toward him. He also came toward me, so quickly that we almost hit each other's heads. We both laughed. The obstacle was that I couldn’t see what was holding me back today. 'I shouldn’t have run toward you. If I had been a little faster, we could have ended up hitting each other,' he said. I didn’t say anything. I thought the funnier this meeting began, the better it would be. Yet, typical him, he just a mind-reader. I only smiled and replied, "Let's just go walk, now." yet I remained frozen in space and time, just me and emptiness. We're walking to the city park and just went around, nothing really far but our steps actually might count like a mile. Restless just with him. I simply sat in silence, lost in my thoughts. It's nothing like there's no other place we can be. It's just I found my complete and I don't need to find anywhere else. "If only our ...
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Do you know why it's hard to say goodbye? Because we afraid if our memories might not be able to remember them, rightly. The fact is, goodbye means good. No matter how hard.
~Aurora Esterlia

When I Was A Fool

Failed for being a friend
Failed to take all being slowly
Then regrets came to my dreams
And that is when I was a fool

To push things far behind
Or even run away from the front
Then needs became missing so much
And that is when I was a fool

And what I have become, now?
I ask and beg for some more
Screaming out loud to got choked
Empty hugs and empty laughters
Done nothing and being fool

So sad, so can not smile
So blur, so can not see
So deep, so can not feel

Curious then cry with all my heart
Never lies but the road leads nowhere
Who would have believed
That it's part of my dream
Nothing's real, nothing's wise

When I was a fool
Seems light was years away
When I was a fool
Seems to leave was the last choice

And rains and lone street are friends
Dance floor and beat of songs guiding
Random people are family
And the night is my lover

I'm finding it hard to do anything
I thought the dream will not let me go
I wish I can put all things to the trash
But life still goes on, and on, and on

It shouldn't be that hard
I have been this very moment many times
It shouldn't be this hard
Where I could whispered it's nothing

When I was a fool
I want to stay
Stay for once upon a time
Once more
Ever
No ends
Hunger

When I was a fool
There, God
Help me!

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