Lost Sight, Found Strength

The path is so dark and dim, but Julie keeps walking. She is scared, yet her adrenaline makes her look back several times, urging her to walk faster with each step. She wonders why she can't move faster and then realizes it's just her thoughts getting wilder the longer she's on the road. She shouldn't have chosen this path—terrified and confused. She's already halfway through. It sucks. The only way is to adapt, over time. She has one more block, two more, and again she convinces herself it's just one more step to her destination. She's no longer afraid when she starts looking at the sky instead of the road. The evening feels scarier when it's right in front of our eyes, but when it's above, the stars are beautiful. The cold air on her skin feels warmer as her mind grows calmer. Gently, she realizes that she's no longer worried. In fact, she's arrived, in no time. -- I think loneliness comes from the mind. It's not about being surrounded ...
Do you know why it's hard to say goodbye? Because we afraid if our memories might not be able to remember them, rightly. The fact is, goodbye means good. No matter how hard.
~Aurora Esterlia

Heavy Air

It's my last time, bad dream.

Me and this Old Town. It's like an empty road but a big one, I was standing in the lobby and watched the street. And, behind me, someone's coming. I turned around and someone asked me to come into a lift. He came out, then came in. He came out again, then came in again. He awaits me to come in. Then, I walked finally to the lift and the lift went up levels.

Arrived at the level. He asked me to clean the whole place. The mop, water, and he seemed very good in cleaning room. He's so busy, but I kept staring at him. Until he seemed tired and rest for a while. I came to him right away. I don't know but I just want to talk with him. I didn't remember what were all this about, our conversation. But, he seemed enjoy it. Me, too.

Because I'm so tired, I walked to a rest place. It's actually a white building, with two levels. Then, when I got in, there's this small guest room, and I can see an indoor-fence, at the second level. I've been here, several times. I was so scared, I want to cry because I didn't want to be here, again. But, I was sitting on a chair and it seems like I won't move anywhere.

There, again. I walked to my old bedroom. A scary bedroom with two doors. I was sleeping but I couldn't sleep well. And there again. Something's wrong out from my bedroom, so I should woke up and leave the room to find what's outside the room. The air on the outside was so heavy. I tried to keep walk and I realized my room was in second floor. I was at the second floor fence, to see what's been at the down floor. And there was this girl, a charming person, I knew it because she wants to talk with me even I couldn't talk. It makes me want to go downstairs. I walked to the stairs, but I passed my room, then I found someone's there. Walking from nowhere, then he prepared to asleep in my bed. It scares me, so I left it and went downstairs. In the downstairs, I found another bedroom. The door was open, so I found what's inside it.
A woman with the party night dress, fix her make up in the mirror, while her two sons, playing jump on the bed.

In my head, I have a thought if I could play with those two boys.

But as I said before, the air around the house just too heavy, I just want to get out from the house. I couldn't help myself. While I was at the guest room, she was supposed to be there. She's there, but I couldn't see her. Like her looks became blur in my eyes.

So, I finally went out from the building. There's someone playing a piano. I followed the voice. It's very cold night. There's no piano. Just someone's there. Again, I was at the lobby. Standing around the cold air, waiting me for come out. He asked me something, but I just remembered what my answer, "No." It's an awkward moment. He smiled and saying goodbye to me. There's a lift behind him, but this time, it seems a dark place to get in. I didn't want to get in, so he left me.

I was all alone. Around the cold night. I came back to the building, and there's this a person waiting me on the door. He smiles at me. But, I just didn't care. Being outside and being inside the building, they're all the same. Again, I walked to upstairs, and ends up me get in to my bedroom.

Scary, really scary feeling.

  

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