Lost Sight, Found Strength

The path is so dark and dim, but Julie keeps walking. She is scared, yet her adrenaline makes her look back several times, urging her to walk faster with each step. She wonders why she can't move faster and then realizes it's just her thoughts getting wilder the longer she's on the road. She shouldn't have chosen this path—terrified and confused. She's already halfway through. It sucks. The only way is to adapt, over time. She has one more block, two more, and again she convinces herself it's just one more step to her destination. She's no longer afraid when she starts looking at the sky instead of the road. The evening feels scarier when it's right in front of our eyes, but when it's above, the stars are beautiful. The cold air on her skin feels warmer as her mind grows calmer. Gently, she realizes that she's no longer worried. In fact, she's arrived, in no time. -- I think loneliness comes from the mind. It's not about being surrounded ...
Do you know why it's hard to say goodbye? Because we afraid if our memories might not be able to remember them, rightly. The fact is, goodbye means good. No matter how hard.
~Aurora Esterlia

The Scientist: "Tell you, I'm sorry"


"You not trust me, we should break up." That was the last time I talked to her. Abby was not my girlfriend anymore. But, guess what, she is the partner of my best man, Rover. Rover, he always works at the apartment, our apartment. It means, no matter what, Abby would always be at the apartment. 
"Tom, is there no any chance so both of you get back together?" Rover asked, this night, while three of us has dinner at the apartment, Rover asked Abby to join it, "Working with her while she is under pressure thrilling me. She always listens this rock song, and suddenly she knows what to do. I said things and she has done things. Now, I wonder if she no need to get back with you. I'm sorry, Tom." Rover drank the wine.
"She is the scientist. She is professional. She doesn't need me to be great at work, Rover." I said.
"No, no. Of course, not. That was what I just said, Tom. But, she is becoming like a robot, no feelings."
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"She made the good conversation, the good jokes, but she did not mean it. She is like an actress. When she smiled, I felt the thrill of a shadow wants to kill someone. Like you!" Rover scared, "She is coming." Suddenly Abby went out of the kitchen. She brought the lasagna and fresh chicken salad. "Abby, those smells yummy. It must good, right?" 
"Yes, my Nana recipes. She used to teach me how to cook anything, until she died because my grandfather abandoned her at the restaurant, she chokes by the Fishbone. My grandfather succeeded." She smiled, "I was joking. I'm an orphan. I used to cook things at the restaurant as my part-job." She laughed with other lies.
"Good one, Abby. Good one." Rover laughed, "I bet it was not based on true event?"
"Yes, it was. It was one of the customers at the seafood restaurant." She said. Rover stops to laugh. He just stared to his own plate. "At least, the grandfather returned to the restaurant and said he was sorry to the dead body of his love." 
"We need to talk, Abby." I just get up from the chair and held her hand to walk outside the apartment. 
"Let me go!" She screamed and pushed me to the side of the street. "I will leave, Tom. We will never good even when we're at dinner. You don't need to be harsh. I'll get my coat." She turned around to get into the apartment and I just shouted.
"I will not forgive you if you get your coat and run away from our issue." 
"We don't have any issues. You are the one who has the issue. The issue of trust!" She got mad.
"I love you." I said it. "I am so not good to see the work between you two."
"We can't, Tom. Not right now." She said.
"I thought you were sleeping with Rover! The morning I found you with his clothes!"
"I knew it! You thought I'm a jerk!" Abby just slapped my face. I was surprised because for what she did and she just cried. "I feel so ashamed. That is all. For two weeks I tried to figure out what is it? What Tom is actually getting mad about? And it was true. You think I use you to get to Rover. I put myself like a cheap bitch."
"And that's why you broke up with me? For two weeks you put me like I'm the one who ruined our relationship."
"I don't want you to feel jealous with your best friend."
"I am sorry." I hugged her. "You don't need to forgive me. There will be no more this silently misunderstood, I promise."
"I need this work, Tom. At least, if you still don't want back with me, at least, I still have reason to see you, everyday."
"I will wait for you."
"I want to finish my work with Rover so quickly, so I won't see him sooner." She said.
"What is that meaning?" I asked. "You said..."
"He is no use anymore. And, practically he is the only reason you spend two weeks got mad with me. If I finish the work right away, I will go for two months from him."
"Makes it three." I smiled from the back. "Now, stop crying." I wiped the tears from her face.
"I love you." She said, "but we still break up until my work finish. This hurt becomes my muse." 
Suddenly Rover came out from the door, "Don't you dare, Tom! You made her cry!" He walked to Abby and hugged her, "Let's get you in." he let Abby walked back to the apartment.
"What is your problem, Tom?" He surprised, "Are you getting back together?" 
"She said she's very busy with you. Then, I just got jealous and she cried."
"How dare you say this? Well, you better apologize to her, after my work's done. She's so good with her work. Are you sure, you alright, Tom?" He asked.
"I'm jealous with you, Rover."
"I know! I already know both of you will be on the edge. That's the more reasons I wish she could be. I never find someone like her. She's so smart when she's in depression."
"Do you think she is your science project?! Oh, no, wait. You made both of us were broke up. You put her your clothes so I was on this jealousy on you."
"Oh, Tom. I won't have feeling for your girlfriend. You should know me better. It was raining that night. She said she couldn't reach your call. So, who's now should take to blame? Oh, let's stop this. Let's get inside. After the dinner, Abby will have the night to complete the serums. You want to stay?"
"No. I will take some motels."
"That's the best answer. She will be more focus with her dark thoughts wonders why you just leave her alone with me. He might think you are giving in. So mean of you." He smiled at me and went back inside.
"She was right about him. Abby shall not work with him anymore." Having a friend like Rover and if your girlfriend has to work with him, I think I will have shortages in this world.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

People thinking : Gay

Kelly's Night

The Man with The Star