One Last Time

an idea: you are a bulletproof girl. Amanda Beth is a common girl, like many common girls. She's being loved by everyone and being hate by some people, too. Amanda is a high school girl with even lower average skills. We have to admit not everyone's smart and not everyone have to be good. So, Amanda gets into a genk, so tho she's stupid, she is saved, not being in bully around the school. She's one of the bully. But, that's not her. Whenever her bad friends are leaving her alone, she's trying to be friend with the bullied ones. She's helping the victims like in ninja ways. As I told you before, she's being loved by everyone, too, right? Amanda is helping them with spreading good things about them rather than against her own friends when the bullying's around. She's doing that for win-win solution and seriously, no ones really feel bad about it. Everyone needs her, but inside of Amanda, she thinks herself as a coward. who thinks
Do you know why it's hard to say goodbye? Because we afraid if our memories might not be able to remember them, rightly. The fact is, goodbye means good. No matter how hard.
~Aurora Esterlia

Hillsong - Oceans, My Contemplation

You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand

I always see things with God. I mean, the big word of "GOD", the universal mystery of power who rules us or the whole world. Like, every time I walk alone or be alone and I have this quick thought, "Why do I exist?". I used to see God in that way. So, God for me is like the ruler of my world, my King, my Mastermind.
It must catches you, whenever you always thought things happened around you and you can't control it, phrasing "And there I find You in the mystery. In oceans deep". For me, oceans is the whole life of me, or you, which you couldn't thought of it. And, there you, me, realize there's Him in the space in our head that we couldn't answer. About, "Why these things happened to me? Why I always choose wrong choices? Where's the path should I take? What's wrong with me? Can I make it?" Thoughts like those. 
Then, these words, "You call me out upon the waters..." is like I found God. It's true. I finally found who's truly God. And, He is Jesus Christ. The word of "..call..." for me is by using your ears. You listen a voice. It could be a voice from someone who calls you and it could be a voice who calls you deep in your heart. You might not see it but you hear it. Then, the ending phrase said, "My faith will stand", it defines exactly Romans 10:17 "So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God." 

And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

The phrase, "And I will call upon Your name", I guess it's a real sentence when we know exactly who's the person that we call. For example, you call someone by their name and it shows how closer you both. I get this phrase as message to know exactly who do you call. What's his name. It's Jesus Christ. His name is powerful. Acts 4:12 says, “And there is salvation in no one else; for there is no other name under heaven that has been given among men by which we must be saved.” To tell you by just calling His name, there's the salvation you found that you had received. To tell you by just calling His name, there comes your strength, my strength.
So, by just calling His name and we're being saved, I guess it's not enough. Beyond this phrase is to get know Him. Go closer to Him. Word of "Call" is not just by calling, but also a communication. Two sides, closer together. By word of "Call", you can see how much you can receive. Remember Matthews 7:7-8,"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened." 
From then, we can see why the following phrases say, "And keep my eyes above the waves," that it means you finally found your confidence to face all the circumstances such as, "When oceans rise, my soul will rest in Your embrace. For I am Yours and You are mine."

Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand
Will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You've never failed and You won't start now


I was wondering about these phrases. Then it comes to me the single word of "Sovereign". Why they use the word for telling about His hand to be our guide? The previous sentence indeed tells us about how great is His grace and overflowing, which be compared by words of "deepest waters". But then, it suddenly jumps to different idea of grace, which is His hand and plus the word of "sovereign". The easiest conclusion for me might be His hand to be our guide is the grace itself. Well, it is true and so relieved by hear that.

I like this song because they keep say sentence of "take me deeper". So, I need to see this song also deeper than by just read the whole lyrics. For me, the deeper conclusion of the word "Sovereign" is to declare about the power of Jesus Christ as our life guidance. He can't be moved(funny thing, it reminds me of The Script song "The Man Who Can't Be Moved) except by Himself. Sovereign means possessing supreme or ultimate power. It's an absolute. And, by telling you that His hand also grace for us, then by word of "Sovereign" it tells you how absolute His grace for us, then it concludes how absolute His ways for you. And because the following sentence says, "will be my guide", I can remind you Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know what plans I have in mind for you,’ says Lord,‘plans for well-being, not for bad things; so that you can have hope and a future." Knowing that His guide for us is absolute, the phrases are really deep. Don't you think?
The last phrase, "Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me, You've never failed and You won't start now." To tell you the truth, 2 Timothy 2:13 says, "If we are faithless, He remains faithful, for He cannot deny Himself." It is true that even He won't start now.

So I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

At this time, I attracted to go deep with phrase, "For I am Yours and You are mine." Don't you know that we are belonged to Him? Isaiah 43:7 says, "Everyone who is called by My name, Whom I have created for My glory; I have formed him, yes, I have made him." At this time, knowing that humans are in sin, none of us is saved without by believe of Jesus Christ, you will more wonder of how can we be so confident by telling that sentence? We are full of sins and God is Holy. Then, it comes to me about the beginning as Genesis 1:27 says, "So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." In physics, God tells us how He creates us with His image. Physic appearance means how God wants us to have dignity in this world rather than any creatures. As He is for us. As we are for this world. 
And for our sins has being washed by Jesus Christ. I can explain it to you. Jesus Christ is The Savior and without sins. Romans 6:6 then says, "knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin." He died for us, for our sins. Why is it so important to be crucified? It is a symbol as Galatians 3:13 says,"Christ has redeemed us from the curse of the law, having become a curse for us (for it is written, “Cursed is everyone who hangs on a tree”)". Knowing that the Roman idea of crucifixion was paramount to their practice of hanging on a tree, it's still the same. And even more, He is being put to shame. It demonstrates that He was cursed of God. It's a big deal of symbol. To tell you the truth that sin is our cursed. And Jesus Christ is our salvation. 
Then, it comes to my conclusion. How can we tell ourselves about, "For I am Yours. You are mine"? Bible answers it by so easy way. John 1:12 answers, "Yet to all who received Him, to those who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God--". He is God. (funny way to explain this. In every fantasy fiction, we are always wishing if we can have extra-ordinary powers, or like in comic books of Marvel, we wish to be superheroes. Now, here's the truth: we are who received Him has the right to become children of God, how come it's not the same as our thoughts about being superheroes?) So, yes, as the children, we will get our parents DNA (medical science). And word of God says that me, you are the children of God. You are already being free from sins. And not just being free from sins but you also being called as His children. How great is our God? He put us back to the same degree where we're meant to be. As He is for us. As we are for this world. 
To go more deeper, for me the sentence of "For I am Yours. You are mine" means we are sanctified by His name. Knowing this, Romans 6:9-11 explains, "knowing that Christ, having been raised from the dead, dies no more. Death no longer has dominion over Him. For the death that He died, He died to sin once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God. Likewise you also, reckon yourselves to be dead indeed to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord."

[6x]
Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior

All of these, I know exactly what this song based on. It based on the story of Jesus Christ disciple, Peter walks on the waters to come to Jesus Christ who is walking on the waters. But, because Peter saw the wind (what wind? we can't see the wind), he started sinking. It's exactly how the song lyrics tell us. Just from the beginning, by name we call Him, to see how we want to get closer to Him, as Peter. But, then the oceans rise, waters, the circumstances, the problems made us afraid. THE WIND! What wind? we can't see the wind, right? It's WORRY. 
The whole phrases is like a pray. Holy Spirit is in us for who received Christ as The Savior. As Jesus says in John 14:15-17, "If you love me, you will keep my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be in you."
The pray is teaching you to LEAP OF FAITH. You don't want to be like Peter who went sinking. You want to walk on the waters. Things like so impossible to be truth. Then, the phrases, "Wherever You would call me" and "In the presence of my Savior" are the whole surrender of our life. To keep walk on this earth, fulfill our life with God walks next of us. Always. That's how our faith can be stronger. We have confidence that God is with us.

Oh, Jesus, you're my God!

I will call upon Your name
Keep my eyes above the waves
My soul will rest in Your embrace
I am Yours and You are mine

The ending. It's still us, wants Him. And, this phrase, "Keep my eyes above the waves", thing that Peter failed to do. 
So, the whole simple message of this song is keep our eyes straight to God.

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